Small Bathroom Pictures

Aziz Ansari's East Village Crawl

Ziz Ansari is bird-­­dogging again. His target is petite, curly-haired, barely post­pubescent. “Puppy!” he hoots, and swoops down on a young woman’s tender young cockapoo, camera-app at the ready. Ansari—stand-up comic, Parks and ­Recreation star, Twitter maven , and now, with the new action-comedy 30 Minutes or Less, marquee-movie player—has ­never met a dog he didn’t feel comfortable accosting. We’re on a walking tour of the 28-year-old comic’s old haunts from his Village days, when he was finishing a stint at NYU’s Stern School of Business and jockeying for slots at the Comedy Cellar. This was before his MTV cult-comedy breakthrough with the trio Human Giant (the other two humans were Paul Scheer and Rob Huebel), before Judd Apatow gave him a high-profile cameo in Funny People and NBC hired him to be Amy Poehler’s smarmy foil on Parks —­before the tractor beam of L.A. locked onto his career and drew him westward. He’s been crashing in New York regularly for the better part of a year, working on material for the follow-up to his “Dangerously Delicious Tour” (the high point of which was a sold-out Carnegie Hall show) and dropping in on clubs to refine new material.

In just two days, though, he’s due back on the set of Parks. These are his last hours in his old bailiwick for a while; and, flâneur and foodie that Ansari is, there’s a lot of ground to cover. “What’s next, what’s next, what’s next” is his restless refrain, as we plunge from gelateria to speakeasy, from taco truck to record shop. He’s been stopped on the street several times by adoring fans and first-name-basis pals alike—one gets the sense that, long before Foursquare, Ansari was ­mayor of the East Village. But almost as many times, he’s the one doing the flagging down, hitting on every passing canine he finds adorable: “See, how can I be mad at people who bother me for photos? I bother puppies for photos all the time.”

“I took some other pictures of dogs,” he says, thumbing through his photo album. “I’ll show you my best stuff. These guys,” he pulls up a pair of English bulldogs, “were hanging outside this morning. And then there’s this guy”—a floppy-haired maybe-cocker mix—“whose name is East 4th Street Gizmo.” His gallery of ­casual quadruped acquaintances is impressive (all the more so because he doesn’t have a pup of his own). “All of these are East Village dogs,” he says, then amends himself: “Well, this guy’s West Village. I saw this dog hanging outside of Kiehl’s, probably picking up some moisturizer. Name? Johnny Jump-Up. I think I saw that dog in a bathroom at Bowery Ballroom, banging some hipster chick.” He scrutinizes it. “No, not the bathroom: He looks like more of a ‘photo booth’ man to me.

@ oh because I saw some of his pictures (bathroom pics) and it looked like a small one but it's probably another one

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